Let's Go Dancing Instead

Someone asked me to give an update on me. Am I the only one who feels like I just gave one on myself? Well I guess it works well because I just downloaded pictures taken of me from last week.  So Here's a bit on me but updated I guess. It's Summertime and I'm really enjoying this hot weather, not really going anywhere much except for bible study and watching 5 little boys. I dearly miss being able to plan events for other people. Covid life is making people have drive by parties and I really miss the intimate gathering that happen. So since I'm not able to make that happen I've been doing a lot more writing and playing board games, card games and a lot of thinking about things in life. I'm dreaming of days where I don't beat myself up for making the littlest mistakes or striving to be perfect in a world that is anything but perfect. And maybe waiting for my happily ever after because what girl doesn't dream of a happily ever after. So for now I'm trying to set a new plan for my life. When Covid changed my travel plans (honestly not angry about that) and my school plans, I've had to readjust my life. Which leaves me in the place I'm in. Learning patience is really a virtue and people are struggling in the same way as me, even if I only want to see their faults. And choosing to love people, Covid has really made it easy to get in an argument with someone and instead of choosing to hear them out and even if I don't agree with them choosing to just listen and not so quick to speak. I've also been rediscovering things I never knew I liked or still dislike so I guess in a way Covid has been everything. It's been hard, challenging, bittersweet and rewarding. But don't get me wrong I'm totally ready for what's trying to be our new normal to end in a way people can resume their lives. Where fear as it is for me has no place here, friendships aren't tested and ended because we can't agree and would rather fight to be right than fight together to end things in the world we weren't aware of.  Where love is still as strong as a tree planted in the ground. I got to work on my analogy but I hope you get the point.  

So until I can get back to planning events and attend school without fear of risking other people's lives, I'll be creating more blog pieces and listening to music and  going on long bike rides. So here's my updated life

In My Room

Just today or more like yesterday because where it's 1:10 in the morning and I should be sound asleep I'm wide awake with a  headache that just won't go away I'm awake. But today/yesterday while I was making dinner a song came on my playlist on Spotify that I was listening to. It was a little strange because I have heard the song over and over again. It got me through many stuck times in my life, many sleepless nights like tonight but I never really thought too much about it. The song is called In My Room by Thousand Foot Krutch and I never really listen to them much in the years they were popular with the Christian kids. But I felt something when my cousin showed me the song, this called me to play it over and over and over again. It's been played over 880 times according to Spotify. But I'm rabbit trailing big time. As I was making dinner and listening to the song. A line in the song caught my attention "But can you meet me in my room, a place where I feel safe, don't have to run away and I can just be me." I listened to the story behind the song ( This band has some pretty neat stories about their lives and the songs they wrote) and it was talking about how people can go about their lives and whenever they feel stuck in a place where they are struggling it's hard to find a safe place to meet/talk because it doesn't feel safe. The song was talking about asking Jesus to meet us in our room (not our bedroom but anyplace we feel safe to talk to him. For the lead singer his room as through his songs and the relationship he has with the Lord. It got me really thinking. For me usually when I'm in that place my safest place is my room and it has always been. As a child and even as an adult I spent most of my life in my room, my haven/safe place. Most teenagers spend a good portion of their teen years locking themselves in their room. It has never occurred to me that the whole song I was listening to was asking the Lord to me you in your room, your safe place where you can have any conversation with the Lord. Not necessarily it had to be"your room." It might make this song seem more spiritual and religious but I guess what I'm getting at is this. Whether your a Christian or non Christian find your safe place and if you're a Christian meet the Lord there. If you're a non Christian keep that as your safe thinking/processing life and goals place. It's important to have a place where you don't have to run away and can just be you.